I've had so many miscarriages I seriously lost count. Now don't get me wrong I know I can get pregnant , because I have a wonderful handsome one year old son. Now I know what SOME of you are thinking. Appreciate that one. Be glad you have him and love him. Why are you even trying to have another. And so on and so on. Well ladies. My husband is older than me. And we all know the older a woman or man is your chances slowly go down. Now I'm still at a good age where studies believe we are good. My husband already has a son from a previous marriage and our son together is my ONLY child. Now for those who can relate I'm sure you've had the TALK about how many more kids are wanted. And that TALK can be hard since your spouse already has one up on you. Anywho, I wanted to try for at least one more before my Husband's time runs out.  I don't mind having my kids close in age and I don't mind waiting either. But I don't want to wait and our chance is gone. Now here's the thing. We are BOTH up for having another  I may even be done no matter the sex of the child. But I keep losing the pregnancy. I had one before my son and now multiple after. If I have one more they are going to determine that something is wrong. I pray not. But I'm at the point that each month we try I no longer even want to find out. Like today glow says I can test today but I purposely did not buy any PT. I don't want to get that yes your pregnant force myself to get excited and then boom sorry you've miscarried again. I'd rather see a negative and move on at this point. Sorry this post is so long. I needed to vent but I know there are women or even men out there who can relate to something in my story wether it's having a partner who is a lot older , constantly miscarrying, someone has a kid already, etc. please ladies feel free to talk or comment your story. I don't want to give up. We should NEVER give up. I'll find my HOPE and so will you all. Thank you for your time.