Am I the only one who wants to cry every time they see a negative pregnancy test. I know I shouldn't be so impatient. I know there are women out there who have been trying much longer than I have. But all I ever wanted was to have babies. I just want to be a mom, and I am toy very beautiful boy who will be three on Tuesday… But when I finally got my second one, I carried him for nine months and gave birth to a stillborn, which are buried on Fourth of July weekend 2016. I want to hold a baby again so badly. Sometimes it helps just to write things out. Sorry for sounding like and I'm grateful brat. I'm just so tired of waiting. I guess all I can do right now is just live on my handsome boy that I do have. Praying for a girl to be next. (also, this is not his car seat… He just really wanted to sit and his cousin seat before he got in the car)