It's been 4 weeks since I have birth to my beautiful rainbow baby so I think it's time to share my story.

Let me rewind to about 2 years ago.. I was pregnant with my son. Throughout the whole pregnancy, from our first appointment, we knew something was wrong. Our son had a heart defect called pulmonary atritia of the arteries (not completely sure if I spelled any of that right). We drive so many miles to go to so many appointments to see so many specialists. By the time we found a specialist who would deliver him he told us he would have heart surgery 2 says after he was born. Naturally we were terrified the whole time.

Well the time came for my 40 week appointment. We went into the room and did the while routine. The time came to check the baby's heart rate and we didn't hear anything. The doctor came in and told us that we lost our baby and we could go to the hospital whenever we were ready to deliver.

I called my family. Told them there was no heartbeat but we were getting our things ready for the hospital. That was probably one of the hardest things I've ever done in my entire life because everyone was waiting on a call that said "it's time. We're having a baby!" But instead they something a little different. Everyone kind of starts to freak out. My mom calls my sister and tells her to come get me and take me to the hospital, but I had my then fiance to take me. And I also wanted some time to father myself.

So we finally go to the hospital. The staff already knew who I was and why I was there and were very supportive. My family was supportive also but I'm the kind of person who likes to make light in a situation like this. There wasn't a heartbeat but I would finally get to see my baby boy.

So I'm induced we start going into labor (forgive me, it's been almost 3 years and I don't remember all the details). It was only 6 hours when my contractions start to the time we start pushing. When he comes out, it's so quiet. There's no cry, no whimper, nothing. I'm just trying to catch my breath because despite everything that was going on, I just have birth. There was a mirror above, So I got to see everything and it was beautiful!! August 30th 2014 I have birth to my son Miles Darin Morgan who was 7lbs 3oz. And he was perfect.

Fastforward:

January 5 2017 I go into the hospital at 6 o'clock in the evening. Get in my gown and into bed. In all honesty, I was really excited to meet my baby, but I was also excited for cable. Lol. Well I guess I say that because after everything I just still couldn't believe we were about to take a baby home.

The family starts to come in around 8 o'clock and already starts to take pictures. I'm given a pill to start dilation and at 2am I have my first contraction. So my husband is next to me sleeping like a baby, snoring so loud! Keep in mind I haven't slept in about 2 weeks because I've been so miserable being pregnant. I was wanting to catch up on sleep for my big day tomorrow. I finally throw something at him and tell him "Wake up! I'm having contractions over here and you're disturbing me!" Lol And he finally gets up to keep me company.

About 10am family starts coming back in and by 12 I'm having really strong contractions. Now this is the part I never understand.. People stand around you like you're dying (even though you feel like you are) like, hello! I'm just having contractions! After I'm 4cm dilated I finally get the good stuff! The guy who have me my epidural was a complete ass but I get it going and I feel so much better.

Now that I can finally relax plus the pain meds making me really drowsy I'm dozing in and out between contractions. I didn't find out til later but when I got the epidural it made my blood pressure bottom out and my husband was freaking out. He said when he walked in I was so pale and my heart rate was so fast but I was just laying so still. He said he thought something had went really wrong.

The contractions start getting so strong to the point I can't help but push. The nurses tell me not to because it wasn't time yet. I'm like well I'm trying not to but it's just a reflex really. I can't help but push. So they finally call in the doc and tell me since I want to push, they are going to let me.

I let my husband and my best friend in the room with me. The nurses start putting me in stirrups and getting everything ready for labor. When I finally get the go ahead to push I do, with all my might. Lol! I feel her head starting to come out I hear my friend go "OH MY GOOOOD!!!" Lol! 4 minutes later I hear that cry I've been waiting for 2 years to hear. I looked at my husband and I could tell he was thinking the same thing. When we get to hold her I just couldn't believe how much she looked like her brother. Here we are 1 month later and I still love to hear he little cries.

So here she is. My beautiful rainbow baby. Madylan Rain Morgan. Born Jan 5 2017. 7lbs 7oz 19 inches long.

Sorry for the REALLY long post but I just wanted to share.