Impending bad feeling?

I'm 5 months pregnant and have had this feeling of I'm never going to meet or hold my baby. I've cried so much over this feeling and I can't stop it. I've felt her move once or twice and haven't felt her since that day, over a week ago, but I just keep getting brushed off saying this early I won't feel her regularly but I can't shake this feeling. I've lost two babies before this little girl and I feel like my fears are not letting me enjoy this pregnancy. I've never made it this far before and everything is new and even more scary. Please if anyone has any advice please help me with this