Too broken?

Despite everything it still hurts like hell seeing any of those sluts of my daughter's father .. i was side by side with 'name' at the gas station in line .. i basically just had my head down hoping to not be noticed, i finished up and got back to my car just to start crying .. he was like "im sorry" when i got home and told him about seeing her and said he feels the same way when he sees 'name' and i was like .. well i feel this way when i see name, name, name, other name, other name and (name) etc and he said how he never sees them .. i always see those bitches

My daughter is 3 months old and i just feel so torn down and broken, i often find myself questioning the point of my existence and if i can truly handle all of this. I don't know what to do, constant embarassment, stress and anxiety i feel as though I'm dying. 4 years is too long