So let me make something very clear here, because apparently people have felt the need to criticize me for this. I made the decision to stop breastfeeding for my mental health. Not because I wanted to, or because society tells me that breasts are meant to be solely aesthetically pleasing.

It was not a decision I came to lightly. I cried for days before I decided. I stressed for over a month as to wether I was gonna be able to produce enough to feed her and for a while I was. Then suddenly, overnight, I just wasn't. No matter how much I pumped, no matter how hard I tried, I just stopped producing. She would feed and would still cry afterwards. And then I would cry. It became a never ending cycle of tears.

With that, I decided to stop. Again, I cried for days. At night, I would dread trying to breastfeed her. Pumping became like a job and I felt I wasn't enjoying my baby, so I stopped. As soon as I made this decision, I felt a weight lifted off my shoulders. I became slightly happy again. I was still devastated that my body was not cooperating with me on this, but I did it anyway. I have it the "ole college try", as they say.

Harley got my milk when, to me at least, it mattered most. She got it the whole time she was in the hospital, and for almost 2 months after she got out. She is perfectly happy and healthy on her formula, and to me, that's what matters most.

I'm tired of these breastfeeding forums acting like formula is practically poison for babies. They say I'm less of a woman/mother for giving my baby formula. What they don't know is the agony I went through to decide to give her only formula. The amount of tears shed coming to said decision. They trash talk women who have had to make this decision, and don't realize that it's not an easy decision to make.

Think before you bash a mother for how she feeds her infant. Maybe she tried to breastfeed, and it didn't work for her. Maybe she doesn't have the support needed to breastfeed. Maybe she simply just can't.

Donating breast milk

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