Postpartum depression/anxiety disorder...

I think i may be developing ppd or postpartum anxiety. I just constantly feel guilty all the time. Im ebf and when my son spits up i feel like its my fault,hes also been diagnosed with reflux and i feel like its my fault.. If i wasnt breastfeeding-would he still havw reflux?? Or is that something breastmilk causes or what.? I feel like he deserves better than what im doing which is my best. I love him more than anything in this world..i keep having thoughts of him getting hurt or dying. Gosh it was hard to even type that "d" word.. I pray to god like 10 times a day to look over my son and make sure hes always safe... Whats wrong with me? I dont want these thoughts in my head anymore. I love my son soooo much. I feel like this is all my fault. I dont know what to do??! :(