Funniest sex stories please!

So last night I was having sex with my guy and I'm using my hand on myself to get there, and I start feeling a little burning...and then a lot of burning. I just started telling him my crotch was on fire and we had to stop. Apparently the serano peppers I cut up a few hours earlier were still lingering on my fingers. I tried to wash it off of my girl but that was no help. All I could do was lay in my bed, ass in the air, and cringe through the pain while my bf rubbed my back and I tried to describe to him just how much it hurt to rub peppers into your crotch. Now. ... what's your funny sex story ?