I thought I was completely secure in my relationship with my best friend/ex boyfriend/lover/my dude. I have self worth & self control & a good head on my shoulders & control over my feelings. Until, after over a year of telling him that it was fine for him to fuck other people, he decides that we're close enough that he can be comfortable fucking someone else without me, & proceeds to find one of the hottest girls in a 3 county area. Like porn star quality & she's also nice & successful & since she's kinda a side chick he doesn't have to deal with her shit like he does with me. I'm about to start my period & ive been stressed recently so I know that's part of my issue, but I am struggling so hard with insecurity & jealousy & possessiveness. I haven't felt this way in about 3 years or more & my stomach hurts & I want to cry. I have no basis to be upset with him cuz he's been very courteous about it all & I've done the same things many times. It's just I'm really attached & love him & may want to spend my life with him & then this awesome chick comes along. I preach tolerance & the joys of open relationships but now here I am. Turns out I haven't made as much progress as I thought..