Fourteen year old's boyfriend spends the night. They are sexually active. Is it neglect/endangerment?

Question

I don't know if this is technically controversial or not, but I wanted to see what the general consensus is about this.

My husband's ex allows their 14-year-old daughter's boyfriend to spend the night, regularly. The two are sexually active (I've asked my step-daughter directly), her mom is aware and still allows him to spend the night. My step-daughter is not on birth control but claims to be "safe" until her mother takes her to get birth control (who knows when that will be).

Either from a legal or moral standpoint, would this be considered neglect through neglecting to parent, or endangerment through enabling sexual activity between two minors? Or is this just a "it is what it is" situation?

Would you allow/enable this?

Answer

Neither are at legal age to even consent, so it would be considered child endangerment, as long as it is not taken out of context

Answer

It depends on your state. Consent isn't typically considered allowed until 16 in most states. Statutory rape laws assume that all sexual activities involving individuals below a certain age are coercive. This is true even if both parties believe their participation is voluntary. Generally, statutory rape laws define the age below which an individual is legally incapable of consenting to sexual activity. 
   
What she is doing wouldn't be considered legal. 
   
In terms of moral, I don't think 14 year olds should be having sex or encouraged to. I personally would be looking to get full custody of my child if this was going on.

Answer

It's neither but I'll be damned if some little boy is gonna be staying over playing sleepover with my (future) daughter. Same with my boys. Show me where you live honey so I can take you right on home!

Answer

That's a tough one. I personally wouldn't allow it, but I'm not sure if I'd consider it maltreatment of any sort. I personally think it's a little bit of reckless parenting. Hard to say.

Answer

I would allow it,  id rather  have a close  watch on them...... but definately  NOT in the same room. I dont  care if i have to make her sleep in my room  that night..... Would  I allow my daughter to sleep over  his house ? Not in a million years.

Answer

Definitley 100% NOT neglect or endagermnet. Just different parenting views. I wouldn't allow it in my house though.

Answer

I would talk to your SO about getting birth control. I would consider allowing a 14 year old to be sexually avtive without contraception endangerment.

Answer

Just a question,  why can't your husband take her to get on the pill? Sadly the mother doesn't seem to be in a hurry,  but it still needs to be done quickly.

Answer

No idea if this could be neglect or endangerment but wow. I would never allow this ESPECIALLY at that young of an age!  She's bound to end up pregnant. She should be at the age of just now kissing boys, not having sex!

Answer

I wouldn't say neglect or endangerment. But it's definitely irresponsible. I would never allow that to happen if I were the parent. If I knew they were sexually active, outside of my home, and I couldn't control it then I would most definitely make her go on the pill. But as a parent, you have a responsibility and the ability to control what goes on under your own roof. Letting your 14 year olds bf spend the night or even allow them in a bedroom alone is wrong on many levels. It's called setting boundaries!

Fourteen year old's boyfriend spends the night. They are sexually active. Is it neglect/endangerment?

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