I lost my dad about 3 months ago and I don't know how to deal with it. I can't talk about him I leave or I exclude myself from the conversation. When my siblings talk about him my answers are yes/no/idk. I never usually talk about or think about him just a little bit to my mom and husband on the phone. I went to the hospital with my husband and i kept thinking about him looking everywhere and crying he was at that hospital previously so that's why I thought of him walking everywhere was just thoughts of him. Everytime I think about him I cry I get depressed like I am now. Right now I have a couple things in life that are stressing me out and then i think about this so I'm just laying in bed listening to music and thinking. I miss my dad I need him. I wish I could accept it but it's so hard to because I feel like he's still at the hospital there sitting watching tv getting better. He was sick and God took him at a ripe age of 68. Do I need psychiatrist? I feel like being happy that I still have my mom but shes in a different country at the moment, she needed her mom. It was hard on her she lost a husband of 42 years. I just when I think of being happy that I have my mom i think I wish I had my dad I just wish he was here. So many situations in life makes me want him close to us here with us. Making life easier because he was truly my rock. I love him. Please someone help do you know why I'm like this?