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I have been wanting to start dating for quite some time now. I never really was eager to date until now. I went out with this guy in the beginning of March and in a nutshell it didn't work out. So I found a new man about three weeks after. His name is Joe. I wanted a fresh start and hoped this guy wasn't like the last one. On April 2nd we both agreed to meet at his place and watch a film. He actually amazed me because he talked quite a bit which gave me a good impression. Afterwards he finally asked me to pick a movie, I did and then we went to his room. We watched a bit of it until he asked me questions about being sexual. He's a guy so it didn't bother me plus I'm an open book anyhow. Then he pulled his sweats down, he initiated sex, I agreed to it, and he took my virginity that night. He knew I was a virgin and was gentle and listened to me. After that I went on home since I needed to be back before 10pm due to some issues. On my way home he texted me saying I was amazing and we still remained in contact. We communicated well until a couple days later. He was accusing me of not texting him, saying I'm playing games and to have fun with whoever "he" is. There's countless times he argues with me through text about cheating and then afterwards he's like "So when can you stay with me again?". But when we're in person he's perfectly fine, like what? I feel bad because I excused his bad excuses and let him give me that sort of attention I never got from a guy before. Which is lethal. On April 26th he wanted me to come stay with him. I did and the first thing I did was question his fit about him accusing me of ridiculous things and asked more questions since he failed to give me the truth about himself. I'll reveal more about the truth later because it's mind blowing that this guy thought he could get away with what he chose to do. He did tell me his last name, his real age, how many kids he had, what his intentions are. His answers were shocking to me yet I still gave into temptation when he wanted sex. That night I laid in bed feeling slutty and far gone from my actual self. My friends were blowing up my phone telling me to get the fuck out. I was afraid that he'd get mad. Every time he moved in his sleep or he was half asleep I'd jump, afraid he'd accuse me of cheating and possibly hurt me. That morning he wanted sex, I let him. After that he had to go to work. I drove home the same morning thankful that everything was okay yet I had negative thoughts about myself. Between now and then him and I still texted. On May 3rd was the last I heard from him since he decided it was okay to start his accusing again. Then I realized enough is enough. I cannot let this guy get what he wants. More power to him. I still felt a bit hesitant and had a sketchy feeling about him. I did a TON of research and found out he wasn't Joe. His real name is Chris. He's not 30, he's 40. He has five kids, which he did tell the truth about. He did tell the truth about what he does for a living. But damn.. He played me good. Who honestly does that? I'm trying to get over this douche. I never told "Joe" about knowing who he actually is. I really want revenge of some sort tbh.

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Idk where this post is going but I needed to get this out of my system instead of bottling it inside. I do apologize if this post got too long..