My husband and I have been ttc for 3 months. This is month 4 and I'm about to ovulate. My husband has an addiction to chew. It's not an everyday thing - at least to my knowledge. It's always very obvious when he has been chewing. He doesn't cover it well. His chewing has caused pretty much all of the problems in our relationship. He had been quite good with it lately and hadn't chewed. He chewed Wednesday night and I was livid. A) because he chewed and he knows I hate it and B) because we're coming up on ttc time and I've read it causes abnormalities in sperm which can lead to problems. He doesn't think it's a big deal but I do and don't want to take the chance. I told him to jack off Thursday night to get them out of his system - I didn't want them anywhere near me. (Though it probably doesn't work like that.) he told me we'd be fine by Saturday (today), which is two days before ovulation - my Dr said to have sex two days before ovulation, on day of ovulation, and 2 days after ovulation. He told me he wouldn't chew or drink much - I had asked that because not only is it easier to get pregnant if not doing that, but also because they can effect the sperm. So, all was fine and back to normal and had planned on having sex today. We went to the horse races last night with his cousins. My husband had a few beers and I pulled him aside and reminded him not to drink heavily. He said yep, it was his last one. We got home and I was pooped so I went to bed around 9:15. I woke up around 4 am and noticed my husband was not in bed next to me. That is typically a tell-tale sign that he chewed and fell asleep on the couch in the basement. I went downstairs and sure enough, I see an also tell-tale vitamin water bottle, go over and smell it, and sure enough, chew/spit in it. I. WENT. APESHIT. I have never felt so disrespected, confused and hurt. I told him we were done, that that was it. I couldn't believe what was happening. He told me it wasn't a big deal. 😡 This incident has taken the chewing and the disrespect i feel when he does it to a whole new level. He couldn't wait a week to chew again for the sake of our baby? I have so little respect for him now and a sincere lack of trust. I went upstairs and got back in bed and he followed me. He stood in the doorway saying my name. I told him we were done, and to get out (of the room). I decided I needed to get away, so I grabbed my purse and keys and headed for the door. He was standing there and was saying my name again, and saying I didn't have to go. I went. I drove around for an hour (4-5 in the morning) thinking about what had just happened. He texted me about 15 minutes after I left asking where I went. I didn't text back. I came home a bit after 5 and my husband was still in the basement. I was expecting him to come and talk to me when I got home but that didn't happen. Today, I've been expecting him to come and talk to me, apologize, etc, but that hasn't happened. He finally emerged from the basement not long ago (it's after 3 in the afternoon). He told me he was going to run some errands. I told him I was shocked he hadn't said anything to me. He said he's too ashamed to talk. So, yeah, that's where we are... Am I overreacting? What should I do?