Lately I haven't been feeling like myself. I hate waking up and I just want the day to be over with the minute I open my eyes. I look forward to going back to sleep. I'm not happy. I smile like I am, but the smile is so fake each time. I've lost who I thought was my best friend because of his gf who doesn't treat him right, manipulates him, and he's in a borderline verbally/emotionally abusive relationship with her and he's the only one that doesn't see that. A guy I started talking to last Thursday blocked me and never told me why. He's had health issues that affect his thinking so I was hoping it was just that. I just feel like I'm too much for anyone to deal with but not enough for a relationship. I'm a Christian and I feel like my values (waiting until marriage, never smoking, not drinking until I'm 21) is part of why I'm not with someone. It's the fact that I won't change that about me. I made this little saying that goes, "The closer the devil brings you to a breakdown, the closer God will bring you to a breakthrough!" but I can't help but think "so when's my breakthrough?" Idk what's going on with me. I'm not sure if I need help or if I'm just in a bad rut right now. Please don't judge, only kind words.