I know I'm going to get judged for this which is why I'm posting anonymously.. I feel like complete shit and needed to get this off of my chest and I have absolutely no one to talk to. I just turned 25 I have two kids (2, and 11months) and one on the way.. It seems like the closer I get to the end of my pregnancy the less patience I have with my kids! I get so easily irritated and some days I wake up and I dont even want them to touch me! Their dad is incarcerated and after he got incarcerated we lost everything! We've been staying place to place and I've been trying my hardest to stay strong and also find us a place to stay. I've been so stressed out and I have been basically taking it out on them. My two year old is a regular two year old but i just cant take how hardheaded he is or if I yell at him he laughs at me! I yelled at him yesterday and he spit in my face! I hit him so hard that he fell to the ground and he started crying and I just walked away and cried. One day I told him I'm starting to hate him. I don't know what made me say that but I feel so bad. I vowed I would NEVER treat my kids the way I was treated and I feel like I am turning into my mother.. I honestly think its because of the stress on top of him acting out .. Thats still no excuse to be so mean to him I hate myself so much right now ..I prayed and cried for him for years after my miscarriage and I told him I would be the best mother and I'm not!! I just want things to get better I'm Losing my mind. I cry every night! I dont want my baby to think I hate him because I swear I dont I love my kids! I just dont even know what to do anymore its making me want to seriously just kill myself. My kids should not have to go through this or deal with my mood swings I just feel like they deserve so much better than me!!!!