Why is this so hard...

Question

Just a rant. My SIL is pregnant and was due within two days of me. 3 weeks ago I found out I lost my little one. Now I see her all the time growing the way I should be. Talking about her baby with excitement like I should be. Never knowing this pain like I should have. People are so insensitive... I just hate this so much and want to have my own happiness..... 💔 rant over...

Answer

I'm sorry you're experiencing this kind of hurt. It's been a lil over a year I lost my baby at 8weeks to a miscarriage and I also had a chemical pregnancy in 2013. I just want to let you know it does get better, time is your best friend.  I sometimes still have my moments when I'm sad or depressed, especially seeing other women pregnancies progressing. I've come to realize that these kind of situations are more common then we think and sometimes have nothing to do with us or our bodies. Just stay strong & things will get better, keep praying, and don't give up! You're rainbow baby is on the way! Baby dust to you ✨🌈

Answer

I totally understand what you're feeling. My best friend and I were pregnant together for a month. I lost mine 2 weeks ago. She has started showing and when I noticed I was instantly upset. I'm happy for her, but at the same time I'm mad bc she gets to keep her baby.

Answer

I understand exactly how you are feeling. I got pregnant in March with my first baby. My fiancé and I were so excited. My first appointment was 2 weeks after I found out. I miscarried before I even got to see the doctor. Unfortunately mine wasn't as simple as a miscarriage, I had a complete molar pregnancy. They have to track my hcg levels for months and hopefully after 6 months I'd be able to try again. I asked my fiancé "do you think anyone in the family will have a baby soon?" I don't know if I could handle it. He said no. The very next day his sister tells us she's pregnant. And now I'm not only reminded by my blood work constantly, I see her growing belly and I am crushed. I am so happy for her because I remember the joy so much and want a niece or nephew, but at moments I can only ask "why not me?" I wish I could make things easier for you but I'll let you know what my fiancé tells me when I'm upset. Timing is everything and everything happens for a reason. My pregnancy failed for a reason and now I am stronger than ever.

Answer

I understand this. I lost two while my coworkers were announcing their pregnancies and then my SIL and my tenant both gave birth in the time between my first and second pregnancies. Then found out my SIL's other SIL was pregnant as well. Slaps to my face all around. Unfortunately it isn't fair to those who are expecting to have to walk on eggshells around those who have lost. I felt bad because everyone acted like I was making them feel bad about being happy.

One of those coworkers carried to term and delivered a still born little girl. She will be coming back to work soon and sitting very close to me. I'm 6 months with my own little girl. I'm going to chose to enjoy the rest of this pregnancy as much as I can because who knows what can happen.

Answer

We were in a similar situation sil and bil were due 20 days after us. We lost our baby at 12 weeks they didn't. Thankfully we had just found out we were expecting again two days before she went into labor. I still miss my son dearly and will always look at their son and know he would have had a cousin his same age. They are not very understanding and I've just stop reaching out to them and we've just healed on our own.

Answer

My sister in law got pregnant by accident 3 months before our pregnancy last spring. We miscarried at 12 weeks and her pregnancy continued. Every time we saw them they were talking about furniture and car seats and diet etc. it was the worst 3 months of spending them with them. It did get a bit easier after the pregnancy was over but was still difficult all the way through my due date. At that point we took 2 months off of ttc and it was very therapeutic because it wasn't in my face every day. Please feel free to message me. I know I could have used someone to talk to but didn't have anyone. No one understood unless they had been through it. Sending love and prayers to give you peace during this difficult time.

Why is this so hard...

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