Staying in a loveless marriage out of convenience?
I got pregnant in college two years ago and we got married right away. He's a nice guy,- good father and there's no major problems like abuse or infedelity or anything like that. But we have nothing in common and even though we care about each other I don't think we're in love with each other. We've been going to counseling for months but nothing has improved. My child is my everything & im a stay at home mom. If we were to get a divorce I would obviously need to get a job and when it comes to custody, I have no money of my own, I'm terrified I will lose him. So I stay married. Like I said it's not like he's abusive or mean but it's a lonely life. Like living with a roommate. I often fantasize about meeting someone else, someone perfect for me who loves my son and I actually feel happy with. But then I realize I'm stuck in this marriage. Please don't lecture me about getting married young, I deeply regret it but did it because I thought it was best for my child & I really thought my husband was the one for me back then (we had been dating for 2 years). Does anyone else feel this way or have gone through something like this? I'm to the point where I dread him coming home from work because i have to fake it and give him a kiss and play housewife for the night with someone I have no desire spending time with.
Also, he knows how I feel. He's intensely religious (goes to church like 4 times a week) and does not believe in divorce so everytime I bring it up he shuts down and stops listening. Which is why I'm scared he'll try to take our child if we did divorce, out of anger. He once said that he would get custody because I have no money & it scared me so bad that I haven't brought it up since.