I wrote this about my boyfriend, and wanted to know if anyone experienced the same thing: These past 9 months for the most part have been shitty. Yeah we had good times, but mostly they were bad. Unbearably bad, and you don't understand that. I was years clean after cleansing my toxic mind and I thought the world was beautiful. Flowers were blooming, even in the dark places. And I met you. A tall, funny, and handsome young man with long term dreams and confidence that I wanted to bask in. I know our relationship was flawed from the beginning, it's no shocker, we had disagreements on girls, your friends, my friends, and spending time with each other. And it's no shocker that our relationship ended with the same problems either. I'm not even upset about the arguments, I understand that you would disagree. But you took it to the next level. You would call me a bitch and a whore, and the only thing you'd have on your brain is sex and how you needed it for me to prove to you that I loved you. As if proving it wasn't enough by spending my time, money, and gave you all the love I had to spare. It wasn't going to me or myself and that's what killed me the most. You knew I was weak, you know and assume I have problems but you still made the effort to make me feel so much more hollow and cold. The flowers that were blossoming in my mind withered away with every jab at my past with other boys, bringing up my exes name. You didn't care how it effected my mental health, you just wanted to win. But I wanted things to be made right. But to you, right was winning, and to me right was supposed to be fair. I broke my heart trying to love you but you managed to shatter what was left.

(Meanwhile, he told me he was sick of me, said I had problems, and said the next girl he'd be with, he'd have sex with, and said for me not to take it personal. And since I said no to him, he has no motivation to work things out.)

I'm not sure if this is abuse in some way, but it really feels like it. Could someone give advice?