Im tired of being depressed and emotional as hell. Sick and tired of pills to help depression and pills to knock me out since i cant sleep.

Letting my past stay behind me. It made me who i am but i cant keep letting it keep me down.

To the guys in my past who blackmailed me when i was thirteen and to the guy who raped me. I wish i could wish bad upon yal but i wont. My wish is that yal get help and see the wrong and hurt you cause.

To family. There have been times ive heard for me to kill myself and not in a joking way but literal. And the times ive been thrown things at or hit with metal objects then laughed at if i shed a tear... You are my family and thats the past we are toxic together but when we do see eachother now there is some sort of bond building it sucks that its taken years to get to this point but its progress. Maybe soon yal will find out what i was going through as far as other past struggles

New beginnings start now!. Weight loss journey, feeling comfortable in my body, loving myself, letting the past go, telling my mom what has happened like with the guys and people .