Sex & Relationships
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Can't sleep I'm so angry with my husband 😡😡😡😡
Isn't it always the fucking same!!! Last night my husband decided at 1:45am while we were in bed almost asleep that he wanted sex. Just out of the blue, when I'm half asleep. I tell him that I'm tired and I think it's a bit late - you know in that polite way you do when you don't want sex but don't want to upset him?! Of course he doesn't take the hint and persists so I just think aw just do it; you'll enjoy it and feel better after! Which of course I do and it's always nice to feel all close and cuddly afterwards and fall asleep in each other's arms. So before bed tonight I say 'will you give me a back rub tonight in bed? I'm feeling shitty so it would be really nice but I really don't want sex tonight. Please?' He says he will! I'm glad that he's agreed cos usually if I ask for a back rub it always ends up in him trying it on so most of the time I don't bother cos I hate having to turn him down. But of course when we finally lie down in bed he cuddles in and then rubs my back with one hand for about 5 minutes!!!! So I said to him, 'I'm guessing that's about the best I'm getting in terms of a back rub tonight?'. He then proceeds to tell me that it's late and he has to be up early (of course I get to sleep all day you know, cos our 3y/o is very kind and lets me sleep til whenever! And obviously she NEVER wakes me up through the night either 🙄) and if he tried to have sex with me at this time of night and I said I was too tired he'd respect that?!!! As if!!! He'd just keep trying until I gave in or I had to be firm and then he'd be in the huff? 😢 so when I confront him and say oh yeah this is totally fair, what about last night? He thinks I'm completely in the wrong cos it's so late tonight (it was 1:20am so earlier than when he put it on me last night). He just kept going on and on so I said fine but you've hurt my feelings. To which he tells me he thinks that's bullshit and there's no reason for my feelings to be hurt. So now he's snoring away in our bed while I lie and cry on the sofa - I'm more crying out of anger than anything!!! Please tell me I'm not overreacting?! I mean I know it's not that much of a big deal but it really does hurt. I have to walk on egg shells about sex with him in case I hurt his feelings but he can just do whatever he wants? I don't know how to deal with it? When he wants sex he just goes on and on - he just rubs and touches me and doesn't let up until I give in or I snap cos I'm uncomfortable and then he acts all hurt and angry with me. What should I do? I genuinely want someone to tell me what I'm doing wrong and how to go about saying no in a way that's acceptable between a husband and wife? Or really seems one sided to me but I feel like we just bicker and bitch at each other about so much pathetic shit that I really just give up 😓 I don't want my marriage to be so pathetic but I don't know what else to do? Does anyone have any advice? I feel like I have no one to turn to 😑