I think I got raped last night. I need advice

I remember having a shit ton to drink last night. And I don't remember much of anything else. All I want to do is cry. If I tell anything he's gonna lie I know he will. Or he'll pretend like nothing happened. It's all my fault and I shouldn't have drunken anything.

He told me it would be our little secret and I just clamed up. I felt like I wasn't in my body. I kept trying to fight myself to gain control of my body but I lost. I'm scared because no ones gonna believe. It's all my fault for drinking.

I dunno what to do. I only remember bits and pieces. (It was my cousin)

*Update* I just went to my local rape center for help and they were closed 😭