I get it. He could have died, it was a serious accident. I'm glad the family pulled together and rallied behind him. it was great to see how many people came to the hospital to make sure he was okay. I know it may seem selfish to ask this now, but why didn't you do that for me? His was a freak accident. I purposefully swallowed a bottle of pills because I wanted to die. Absolutely did not do it for your attention. Even if you all had come to my bedside it wouldn't have made me want to die any less. But why didn't you? Why weren't you there? Why did no one show any concern. Why did know one show any kind of emotion when I was let out of the psych ward? Why did you make it feel so insignificant? Mom, why did you talk shit about me after? Why did you say it was my fault that you were talking shit? Why didn't you guys care? Don't you see that's part of why I wanted to die? Because I knew I didn't matter. Which is why i tried again. I got closer, but my roommates called the ambulance and they ruined it. I couldn't even kill myself correctly. But it wouldn't have mattered anyways.