it's OK to not be ok

Blevins

I just read an article about being pregnant after a miscarriage and thought it might help some of You. The link is at the bottom but here is my story. For me it was hard! I got pregnant within the same month as miscarrying. This meant I never really hard time to grieve, that and it also being the middle of December I had my first Christmas in a new country with my new husband to plan! Luckily my husbands leadership gave him a week, if not more to be home with me. They were all super supportive, which made it easier. I really didn't want to see anyone, I wanted to sit in my house with my husband and do nothing say nothing just be. But my husband had other ideas... He invited everyone who offered to come over over. I think this was honestly for the best though. As little as I felt like entertaining, not that I really had to, it was nice to know I wasn't alone in dealing with anything there was plenty of people for me to talk to and be around, even though none of them had been through it. We hadn't been trying long, only 4 or 5 months when we first got pregnant but finding out I was pregnant in January was such a shock. But I couldn't have been happier. I was also terrified though. Scared that I was going to lose this pregnancy too. I was terrible, checking for blood every damn time I went to the toilet. The first 6 weeks were the hardest. My first scan and hearing his little heart beat was a blessing! The most amazing experience ever. And here I am now 31 weeks pregnant, this little baby boy moving all over the place inside me, feeling every kick, roll and hiccup, still terrified that something is going to go wrong. I guess that feeling never goes. #itsokaytonotbeokay http://www.scarymommy.com/melissa-rauch-pregnant-after-miscarriage-essay/?utm_medium=partner&utm;_source=iqx