Finally talking about it

I was going through so much in earlier this year. My grandma passed from cancer on April 19th! I was very close with her and she always said when u gone give me a grandbaby and I would laugh and say a few years lol! That day was me and my boyfriends anniversary of 8 years together. I was devastated! I guess I didn't think of missing a period because may 20th I had severe cramping and stayed home instead of going with my boyfriend to a family function. I had to work that night but called off to go to the emergency room! I was worried and never seen large clots like that before. They said I was pregnant and had a complete miscarriage. We were shocked and I do want kids badly! I'm a nurse assistant at Uh babies and children's hospital! So it was so hard emotionally and physically still to go to work! I cried everyday because it was a blow to my heart! I was still on the passing of my nana!