I am posting because I feel alone and need a place to vent. My DD is nearly 7 months, I knew I wanted two kids very close together in age so they could grow up together and I would be done with pregnancy. I want to stay home with them until they start school so close in age all be it hard is what sounded perfect to me. I took a home pregnancy test about 3- 4 weeks ago, kind of playing around, and it was positive. My first pregnancy went by with no issues so I didn't have miscarriage on my mind at all. I am a planner so I jumped on Pinterest and immediately started getting ideas for the gender reveal and baby shower. Also kids shared rooms ideas and what items we would need for baby #2. I was nervous to have two babies so young but so excited for my daughter to have a sibling and my SIL is also pregnant so the cousins would be close in age. This past Sunday I noticed some bleeding so I went to the hospital. My first OB appointment wasn't until the 27th of this month. They ran test and took ultrasounds. The gestational sac was there but misshapen and no embryo could be seen. Before I even left the hospital the bleeding had begun to worsen. Monday I had bad cramping followed by very heavy bleeding. Although they didn't give me a definitive answer at the ER, I know I've lost the baby. I have a follow up appointment today with my OB. I don't know what to expect. I've been struggling with my emotions, sometimes I feel fine and then sadness hits out of no where. I'm extremely irritable. I haven't really had time to process it. As soon as we returned from the ER DH mowed the lawn and then we had dinner at his grandmothers, who didn't know. Then straight to bed and he went to work the next morning. He wasn't home until 9:30 pm and then we ate and he was exhausted so he fell asleep. Yesterday nearly the same thing. He worked all day then returned home late ate, showered, played with baby for an hour, then bed. I care for the baby during the week so I have no time. I just feel so alone. I am going to my appointment alone today. I didn't want to ask him to take off work and he didn't offer or seem to think it was something he should be there for. I just don't feel understood at all. I don't feel comfortable showing emotion in front of the few others who know so I just put on a brace face and go. I'm dying for my husband to step up but he just doesn't get it I feel like. I have mentioned to him that he's the only person I want to talk to about it. That I need him to hold me (haven't had time with baby girl and work). I just really need him but I hate having to spell it out to him what to do to comfort me and the things I have mentioned haven't been done so it is just making me resent him now.