Lost and sad

Today I found out I'm most likely miscarrying (hcg levels are not rising like they should) and that my friend is pregnant and got pregnant on birth control. I've been trying for 2 years and have had 3 miscarriages this year. How am I supposed to get through this? Our babies would have been a week apart if this pregnancy worked for me. Now I have to watch her be pregnant and struggle knowing I should be right there too. Idk how to handle any of this anymore. All of our pregnancies have happened through <a href="https://glowing.com/glow-fertility-program">IUI</a>'s and all have ended too early. And she got pregnant on birth control. I just don't understand. Why is God doing this to me? Please help me understand if you can or have any advice. Thank you.