I couldn't think of a better place to let out these emotions. We found out I was pregnant on April 23rd, my boyfriend of 5 years and I were thrilled. We love each other why wouldn't we want to raise our child together? I went to my first apt at 6 weeks and there was a tiny hb and then back again to change doctors on May 16th and again, beautiful strong hb at 8 weeks. All the doctors said not to worry. I went back on June 16th this time really to see feet and arms, movement. My boyfriend came with me to support me and see his growing baby but this time things were different. My body didn't know. My cervix was still closed and my baby was dead. It died 4 days after my last apt. We were shattered, unable to pick up life from there. We are still trying to put ourselves together but we both felt a depression we knew would last the rest of our lives. You never forget, any of it, the first positive test, the first time you got morning sickness, the happiness you felt from carrying that unborn life. Now everything feels so different, so flat. It was the most traumatic and horrific event to ever happen to me and I speak from my heart when I say, I'm so sorry. To all the women who have experienced this pain. We were mothers.