So I'm currently back with my ex as I'm 23 weeks pregnant with his baby. I'm so excited about the baby only because we have been together for a total of 7 years and this is our first time getting pregnant. The reason i called him my ex was because 4 years into our relationship he started a relationship with another woman.. at the time I was still head over heels with him and most likely had low self esteem and didn't know how great i was without him so i begged and begged him to stop and he always said he didn't love her and wanted me.. this and that.. just a mind game to keep my "weak" self.. this went on for about a year and half until he finally tells me that she is pregnant. This to me was the utter betrayal because I had always wondered why I never got pregnant by him but she did. So the day I found out, I decided no more... we stopped talking for about an year and half, although he tried many many times to get ahold of me. During that year and half, i got through the pain and heartache and began dating someone else. That also ended up being a flop on his end.. he too had secrets but none that affected me so we went our separate ways. So then i was single for a few months, just keeping to myself manwise.. no dating or sex.. and my ex comes back into my life. After all those months of trying to text me and call me, i gave in but still had a huge guard up..still hurt that, he now has a child. But still in love with him. The old him.. the before the baggage him..anyways.. i ended up getting pregnant by him so I'm currently trying to make things work out between us, I want my child to grow up with 2 parents not just one like how it is with his son.. back and forth to each parent every couple of weeks. Its a hard transition for me.. every time i look at his son, i see the woman he cheated on me with. I still treat her son very good although i feel like im dying inside. And i try my hardest to be happy about it, but when i have my bad days, my ex now boyfriend doesn't understand. He gets so offensive about his son. And thinks I'm acting like a child when its just pain i feel inside. And i feel like im sacrificing everything. He wants me to be happy around him all the time and to just know when to do certain things for his son and gets mad when i dont. Now being pregnant, I'm an emotional wreck and he thinks it's childlike when i cry but he's so mean about the whole situation and tells me that I'm joining them meaning him and his son, although i was there for 4 years before he even was born. I just need him to support my feelings and know that i need time to adjust. Then i often regret becoming pregnant with him but on the other hand im so happy and in love with my unborn child. Thats all i wanted was a family.. just not so dysfunctional. Just needed to vent.. im currently on the couch because he and his son are in our bed and his son moves so much and kicks me in my stomach and back and sleeping pregnant is already hard to do so i get kept up.. and my bf got mad about that because he wants us all in the same bed.. telling me fuck you go lay on the couch then.. so here i am. Well good night.