Wish I didn't care

It's a long story but I'll try to make it short. I started dating a man who was going through a divorce. He would spend weekends with me and days through the week with me. Never was on his phone. I never dreamed he was still actually married and never was getting a divorce. So the time he spent with me got shorter and shorter. Then I actually found out the truth. He's married and not getting a divorce. And I found out in January I'm pregnant.

He begged me to abort. I told him I didn't expect anything from him but I'm keeping the baby. Everyday I think of him. I feel stupid and wish I was smarter. The thing that upsets me the most is I miss him. I see couples at drs visits and wish I had someone. I'm not really searching for advice...I'm just angry I can't get over him. He's a liar and here I am missing him?? Doesn't make sense. I feel stupid.