so much trouble in paradise dnt really know where exactly to begin...

1. he has tlked to girls on fb since we have been married 5 years ago

2. he does it knowing that it bothers me because we deleted fb for that same reason and he keeps opening it

3. idk if he has physically cheated on me but emotionally has

4. he told me about an hour ago that i never am there to support him

5. since day 1 i have but we have gone over number 1 numerous times already and its not fair

6. he says i dnt has aspiration for the future (i do ) however im uncertain if the future has us both together

7. im tired of him judging me not wanting to get a home if he in my mind has cheated one too many times and just wants me to get over it like if its easy

8.he always talks shit about my fam but yet they help us more than his a lot actually cant count on his family for anything especially his mom who always wants money and or always says her son is perfect

9.he complains that i complain about the pain i am having with this pregnancy

10. he says he loves me but clearly doesnt i mean after more than a 100 take backs he doesnt change eccept for a month or 2

11.im honestly over it and fine with being a single parent. just feel bad for our unborn child because its not her fault and i feel bad for our boys who r gonna be 3 in dec.

12. i guess in honesty i have been here for him cause i feel he is alone

13. he says i dnt have ambition that i only want to work manual labor jobs but those are the ones that pay good and in actuality if i did go to school to be what i wanted he wouldnt have approved because i wanted to be a cop and he didnt want me to

so i know what ppl are gonna say that i should leave him honestly i know i should too because i dnt know if i still love him or not, not to mention that he at times is super disrespectful and calles me names and all offensive stuff in spanish when he is pissed....all i ever wanted was the family i never had my dad never actually gave a shit about me and my brother and my mom was basically a single parent i just wanted a family a house my kids my dream job but i know it wont happen with him cuz i just dnt trust him...hi he needs the approval of other women like he needs to feel handsome or whatever. Im sorry i just need to get it out somewhere cuz i dnt like to talk about marital problems with the fam especially now that the dr. diagnosed me with anxiety and im scared that after bby is born i it might develop into PPD