SO and self soothing

So my SO absolutely does not believe that a baby cannot manipulate. My son is almost 8 weeks and my SO cannot stand that I want to tend to his every cry, which I'm gonna be honest is a lot! He thinks I'm completely spoiling him, and to be honest it seems to be ruining our relationship. I've tried telling him of the studies done and the books written on this matter but he refuses to believe it. He comes back with "yeah and look what kind of world we live in now, because everyone's been coddled..."

He also believes since he has an older son and did this method before, the whole self soothe method and his kid seems to be fine that it works...he says a baby has 3 needs, to eat, to sleep and to go to the bathroom, if all that is taken care of there's no reason to run to him when he cries or hold him all the time. How can I convince this stubborn man otherwise