Orgasms..

I can't cum during sex.. I feel so bad because I don't want my boyfriend to feel like his dick ain't shit.. but I also masturbate different than most girls do. My clitoris cannot be touched directly. It hurts. I push on it from the hood and gradually get to the point of a clitoral orgasm. I haven't had a REAL full blown body orgasm since I was young and had "wet dreams". How can I achieve those full body orgasms again? It frustrates me because I know my orgasms can be a LOT stronger than just clitoral pleasure.