TW: Eating disorders, weight

My partners eating habit are so triggering for me. I've had issues with food since I was young, including a period with purging and binging, which I still have some urges to do.

My relationship with food is complex and I have to constantly keep it in balance. I'm so outta balance right now. My partner also has had food issues her entire life however she has not dealt with them at all and is so unwilling to try. I constantly bring up my concerns surrounding food and our bodies and she often ignores me or gives a good talk and continues on with things such as:

- Sneaking entire meals when I'm asleep r not home

- Eating giant portions and then feeling sick

- Hiding snacks that I find remnants of

- Not cleaning up after herself in the kitchen so we are forced to eat out (I don't cook due my schedule/disability)

she's gained a ton of weight in the past year and her body is struggling (limited mobility, irregular periods, joint pain, blood pressure, poor sleep, sex issues etc).

I'm struggling not only to keep my own eating habits and thoughts in check but also seeing her in this outta control spiral and the toll it's having on her body and health.

I just needed a safe space to vent about this to.