do you ask divorced individuals for marriage advice?

Question

my husband and i are going through a tough time right now. i am totally in favor of trying to repair and save our marriage, but who do you choose to go to for advice?

Answer

I go to people who believe in self growth, challenge me and my whiny self pity perceptions, and are proponents for marriage. I stay away from anyone who would flippantly tell me to "do you" or I don't "deserve" certain treatment, or condone giving ultimatums. We're all tiny kids on the inside living out familiar forms of suffering and not understanding our own hurts and triggers. We expect marriage to be something to get something from instead of something to give. We blame everyone else for our feelings. It's all backwards.

Answer

It's perfectly fine to go to divorced people for advice.  They can give you a perspective simply from the lessons they learned while being married, whether it be things they could have done better or advice about how to move forward. Don't discount people just because they chose to end their marriage.

do you ask divorced individuals for marriage advice?

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