Laying here crying

I had a chemical pregnancy last month and I told my husband I wanted to give up that it was ok and the odds were against us and I couldn't do the disappointment anymore and feeling like I'm the only one that wants a baby. We have kids, but this is a second marriage for both of us and we wanted to have at least one together, or so I thought. When I told him I wanted to give up he talked me down from the ledge and said he wanted to try etc etc BS BS. I'm ovulating right now and we had plans to try again, but here I am alone in the bath tub laying here crying like a damn idiot because I feel like I'm alone in this. He is downstairs drinking beer and watching a movie he has seen a hundred times. 1) he knows when he drinks he doesn't cum 2) my husband rarely ejaculates. He had surgery etc, it's medical 3) my husband RARELY WATCHES TV! I'm obviously upset and he asked if I was and I wanted to scream "YES YOU DOUCHE ROCKET WE FUCKING HAD PLANS" but instead I'm here hoping for a baby that I'm probably never going to have. Our chances are very slim so it's not like we can have sex every other day and hope for the best. We have to make sure that we have both ingredients or we will forever miss the mark. I know I didn't write this to my husband because I don't even know how to tell him how I feel. I'm writing to however is reading because I need it out of my head.