Ugh I can't stand this shit!

My boyfriend and I have a daughter together him and I both have a boy from before mine is 5 his is almost 4. His sons mom is fucking stupid seriously litterly. Common parenting shit, like you should know your kid needs to visit the dentist regularly when they grow there teeth. He has went ONE time she said. (I asked her about it) And his teeth in the front our all spaced out and he only has 4 they are ALL rotten like brown as fuck! He's not at all potty trained, he DOESNT talk he says like 30 words and he doesn't sound normal. Honestly don't think she takes him to the doctor as he would of gotten some kind of help by now n my bf (idk why) doesn't mention shit to her I'm always telling him he needs to tell her something. His son was also on a bottle til he turned 3. She's a really dirty girl her house is disgusting! The whole time I've been with my boyfriend this girl has not bought her kid any clothes I see him in the same things all the time. Am I over reacting and should this not get to me?