Boyfriend is very gentle towards me, but gets angry easily and turns aggressive. It scares me

I have mild PTSD. The severity ranges depending on trauma and triggers, but as of late, it has been more under control and therefore "mild". I also have severe depression and anxiety (for reference in further information).

My ex was abuse in all aspects BUT physical--however, when we fought, he'd hurt himself by punching walls, light poles, using glass to cut himself, all in front of me. He would hit things right next to my head, making me think he was gong to hit me instead. He has also given suicide threats, but stopped after I actually called the police on him and they took him to get a psych eval. He was abusive in a way hat would manipulate me into staying with him and he had a hard time controlling his anger.

When it comes to physical abuse, I have never been a victim. I grew up being spanked and pinched (my mom is Asian, this is discipline in her culture, and that's how we were raised). When I was 17 (I'm almost 21 now) I had gotten into a fight with my parents and was extremely suicidal. I tried to cut my neck in our downstairs bathroom and my parents came to check on me but I wouldnt open the door, so my dad used a card to get it open and my parents burst into the room with a lot of anger. I was crying and telling my parents that I wanted to die and my mom started slapping me. I cried even more and had the worst anxiety attack I've ever had in my life (I couldnt breathe, move, talk, etc) and my mom started panicking so she took me to the ER where I was treated for suicidal ideation. We are past this now and I have completely forgiven my mom but being touched like that still scares me, and I get an anxiety attack. My youngest brother was very aggressive and threw things at the rest of us, scratched us, and tried to hurt us but that stopped when he started middle school (he started playing the drums, that helped relieve a lot of his anger). He still has trouble when it comes to yelling, but he is not physical about his anger anymore.

I used to pull my hair, scratch myself, pinch myself, self harm with a razor/anything sharp I could find, and hit myself to the point of bruising. This stopped after I turned 18.

My current boyfriend has never hurt me, or gotten upset with me to the point of "raging" or being angry, but he is a competitive gamer and is easily angered by other things/people. There has been multiple occasions in which he has not only yelled, but has punched holes in his wall + bedroom door, broke his favorite pair of glasses, a glass cup, thrown things, banged on his glass desk, cut his hand, and bruised himself. The first time I saw him angry, I rubbed his back (I am physical comfort sort of person) and he yelled at me; I sat in his kitchen for almost an hour drinking water and trying to calm myself from an anxiety attack. I can not be yelled at without crying, or at least being on the verge of when it comes to something like that.

I am scared out of my mind when he gets upset. He has never once been rough with me out of anger but I fear that his inability to control his response and reaction to anger will get out of hand when I make him angry and he will treat me like a punching bag.

I dont know how to not be scared. I am afraid when this happens with anyone, including my brothers (who are much bigger than me).

**EDIT**

My current bf only knows about my ex, he doesn't know about my family.