It was a mistake that we had sex that night. We just knew each other. We're both strangers. All those BC and planB, they failed me. They failed you. The night I found out I was pregnant I went blank. It was the same night I find out you already move 3000miles away. It was the same night I decided abortion is the right thing to do.

You said you're coming the next week to be here for me trough all these things. You did.

But I did grow feelings for our baby in that one week before you come. I did consider to keep it. I wanted to keep it.

In that hotel room I start using the pills. My heart hurts and it's hard to breathe. I don't want to do this. This is our baby. MY BABY. You talk to me trough it. The benefit and loss with us keeping the baby. I know it is the right thing to do but I want to scream that I don't want to do this. Thankyou for being supportive when I know you just want all of this to end fast. I'm sorry I just leave like that. I can't face you, I felt so much hatred towards you.

The doctor said he couldn't see our baby. It's not there anymore. I'm smiling but I'm about to burst in tears.

It's been a month, you already flew back to where you are now. The pain is growing everyday. I lost my baby. If I had a chance I would've keep it. I'm haunted with regrets. But not you, you didn't feel the pain. You have nothing to worry now and I have to live with all this regrets for the rest of my life.