October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month, usually I don’t talk about things like this, (or like to anyways) but as someone who dealt with DV in a relationship this is something that is heavy on my heart and I feel the need to speak out about it. I spent two years in a relationship that destroyed me, literally. He abused me in every single way you could be abused and to this day I can still tell you about the look in his eyes when he hit me, or pushed me into walls, or any of the other things he would do. That part of my life is something that I for so long wanted to forget, but I know that, that will always be something that I remember whether I like it or not. He talked to me like I was worthless, he acted like he was the only person I had, I cut off friends, and quit talking to my family as much because of him, I was alone, I was scared, and deep down for whatever messed up reason I thought he loved me, he would tell me things like “It’s your fault I do this.” “If you’d just stop I wouldn’t do it.” I would always try to change myself, because I thought that if I changed and did what he liked he wouldn’t do it anymore. At this time I was in a VERY bad place in my life and I was just very vulnerable, there are still some things he did that I will probably never tell anybody because it was just so bad, and I was so ashamed of myself because I was the type of person that “Was never going to let a man put his hands on me.” But yet there I was letting him do it. I would try to defend myself, I’d try to fight back, but considering how much bigger he was than me that didn’t really work. He still tries to deny it, he can deny it all day long but I know what he did.
Anyways, if you or someone you know needs help never hesitate to call The National Domestic Violence Hotline tel:1-800-799-7233
Yes I went through hell, but in the end it made me so strong. I pray that if you are going through a situation like this that you do get the help you need. This is most definitely not something that should be taken lightly.💜💜
And all of this happened to me from the ages of 14-16. My birthday is also in October and I turn 18, I got a beautiful baby boy out of that horrid relationship, me and my ex have no contact with each other anymore and my son was what gave me my strength to move forward from what happened to me.💗