I'm a teen but closer to my 20's and I am scared to raise my kids like I was raised. My father was a crack head but we left when I was 5 or so. When I got older I loved to talk I was such a happy kid when I was about 9 I hated myself because everyone told be I was annoying and I talked to much and I need to learn when to stop. Once my mom started ignoring me and telling me that too my I stoped talking as much and I was miserable. So now that I'm older people fucking ruined me I'm so scared to talk to anyone in fear I'll annoy them and I annoy them anyways because I'm "too boring" I've been put down in life so much to the point no guy will ever stay long enough for me to open up to so that means no husband no kids no one to love me. I stoped seeking attention from anyone and if I EVER have kids they will know that they are loved and can talk to me without getting in trouble. My whole life I felt like a mistake nobody cared to fix and I was always put last after my siblings I will always be unwanted and unloved