This is a little complicated.

My boyfriend was sponsored by an authentic Christian white couple from Texas to come to the USA. He’s from Moldova 🇲🇩, a little 3rd world country by Russia. His biological parents passed when he was young. He’s white and I’m Black. My parents are from Haiti, the poorest country in the Western Hemisphere.

My boyfriend dated a black American girl in high school and kept it secret from his parents until senior year. When his parents found out they were very upset and told him that he didn’t need to date a girl like that (a black girl) and that he should break up with her. He refused to and they were calling all of their family to try to convince him to break up with her. Eventually for situations outside of the race issue they broke up.

My boyfriend and I started fooling around in may of last year. He came over to my house all the time but I could never go over to his house unless his parents were not home. I asked him about it one day and he told me why. I understood but was a little sad that I couldn’t meet his parents.

In July of last year we started seriously dating. I introduced him to my parents and bring him around my family quite a lot. He has a biological brother who lives in Louisiana. One weekend his sister in law invited him over to celebrate his brothers birthday and invited me over with him. It was an amazing weekend. His brother and sister-in-law were very sweet and very eager to get to know me (I was the only girl he ever dated that got to meet his family). While on the phone with his adopted family, his brother casually mention that he brought his girlfriend over. My boyfriend was PISSED. Word finally got around to his parents who didn’t understand why he hasn’t introduced me to them. They know that I’m black and according to one of his cousins (who shared with a mutual friend) it doesn’t bother them and they couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t tell them.

Around Christmas time my boyfriend’s family came to visit and asked if they could meet my parents and he told them no. He didn’t mention me to them or talk to them about anything we did. They assumed we broke up and asked why. He didn’t say anything. He spends a great deal of time at my house and not a lot of time at home. His parents asked if had a girlfriend and he said no. They asked who his friends were that he was hanging out with and he couldn’t tell them because he doesn’t hang around many people besides my family.

I asked him why he did that and he said he was protecting me from his family. I totally understand he doesn’t want to make waves but if his parents know about us already and his brother met me and liked me I wasn’t sure what the issue was. His family is very upset with him because he’s lying to them and they know that. They ask him where he spends his time and his money and he keeps lying to them.I told him to avoid people being upset with him he just needs to come clean. He refuses to do so. Growing up he was hurt by a lot of people so relationships are scary for him and he said that he wasn’t 100% sure that this relationship would last so that’s way too much drama to go over something so short. He told me that around 6 or 7 months and that made me so heart broken and upset.

My boyfriend and I have been dating for slightly over year now. We have a really solid relationship and we’ve talked a lot about marriage over the last couple of months. We’ve come a long way. He’s really changed a lot and opened up to me over the course of the year and made efforts to build our relationship and build me up. He told me that I’m The first person in his life to show him genuine love and he respects and loves me greatly for that. He cherishes what we have and wants to build that into a successful marriage. He doesn’t mean to do harm but he’s hurting himself by not letting people around him know what he’s doing.

Recently his adopted parents told him that needs to get a job and move out because he isn’t telling them what he’s doing and they’re getting nervous. He’s an international student who can only work 19 hours a week on a college campus. He doesn’t have enough courses to get an associates so that he can work offs campus. I want what’s best for him so I told him he needs to come clean but he won’t listen.

Your thoughts?