Is she too little for this?

My daughter recently started to throw tantrums when I'm trying to change her diaper cause she just wants to run away. Usually we have to distract her with a toy or something or make silly faces so she can sit still because other than than, nothing will work. She also throws a tantrum when she's in her car seat. We don't get why. The straps are lose enough, but also tight enough. Nothing is hurting her. I've checked everything I could possibly check to see what's the problem and it really seems like she just wants to get out. Because as soon as I take her out, she's calm and stops crying. So today, my husband had enough when he saw me struggling trying to put her pants on cause nothing was working this time and she was throwing her self back. So he sat down with her and kept saying no Lexi and at some point raised his voice when she refused to let us put her pants on. So he just held her down while she cried. No strong force, just trying to hold her down so she knows throwing a tantrum isn't going to work anymore. And when she cries in car seat now, she's told me to just let her cry. Because she refuses everything and anything to make

It better. She's 10 months and I don't know if we're wrong for this? I feel really bad because she's little and seeing my husband frustrated with her today and not letting her get away, made me feel bad because she kept crying,