Random question.

Do you ever get that feeling you try and put effort in but your partner husband just doesn’t give anything back???

I do most things, I work as does he.

I get up at 6am every morning and do school lunches, swimming lessons, soccer lessons and dancing for the kids.

I cook bulk meals for work. So he doesn’t have to eat crap etc.

I clean and I occupy the kids and do homework etc .

Simple things that shit me off.

I ask him to come do Xmas shopping with me today and he does the mmm yeah. But then sits on the phone and plays golf. My youngest and I just leave. Then I get Home and he expects me to tell him about all the presents. FUCK THAT!

I ask him to come places and do things but it’s just too much effort. But as soon as his mates message or anything well suddenly he has all his energy and motivation.

I know I don’t go around talking like a complete derro, drinking till I pass out, compulsively lying with every word that comes out my mouth like they do.

I understand that when I do things it involves our girls. He can’t remember shit when I’m at work like soccer lessons but you tell him a bucks weekend date or anything he remembers for months.

I have asked him for months to put in for next weekend off Cos we are going to climb the Sydney harbour bridge for our ten year anniversary. STILL HASNT.

Just little things feel like a massive amount.

Feeling like why the fuck do I bother anymore.

I have dealt with death for the last four years . Two people I love have passed on due to brain cancer and I spent all my time with them without skipping any of the above jobs I do daily. I have sold their house, executed a will, organised graves etc alone. So why can he not help me, why I am constantly trying.

I have spoken to him numerous times and he does the im sorry I’ll try. I’m sorry .

I’m about ready to say I’ve had enough.

I do deserve better. And I’m not trying to sound selfish but I think the kids and I deserve to come first over his foul mouthed loser mates who I am always kind too.

So exhausted!!!