I’m only interested now that he’s toxic!!!

Em

Hey, one of my coworkers and I have been talking for a little over a month. The entire time I was a little flighty, and whenever he called me beautiful, invited me over, or tried to initiate things sexually, I was pretty content disregarding it and moving on. Basically, I was a little interested on occasion, but generally didn’t want anything to happen. During my last shift I found out that he was sleeping with one of my female coworkers around the same time that he started talking to me (she was under the impression that they were exclusive because they did a ton of secret relationshippy things) and she only found out because I showed her one of the notifications in the beginning. SO NOW we know he’s an asshole who’s trying to pull two girls, which is why he was so dead set on keeping the content of our conversations secret. My coworker even said that he didn’t want ANYONE to know about their relationship, red flag right? My issue is this: I 100% want him now. I’m not going to actually try anything because the girl is a big sweetheart and I value her friendship more than some asshole’s dick, but this whole situation makes me want to sleep with him at least. Definitely more interested than I was a few days ago. Why am I like this??? So screwed up that I only like him when it turns out he’s a toxic asshole!!!! Help !!!!!!! (we’re 17 and 22 respectively, he’s 19. please don’t disregard the validity of this post because of my age! thanks❤️)