So I've wanted a baby since I had a miscarriage at 16. I'm now 28 and just had my first looong awaited baby and he's perfect and I absolutely adore him. Sometimes I cry looking at him because I'm so happy and he's so perfect, my heart just can't take it. But I really didn't get how hard this would be. He's been colicky, acid reflux, won't be put down without screaming, refuses a bottle, etc so I'm terrified about going back to work in 3 weeks- he's 10 weeks now and even when he sleeps sometimes 7-9 hour stretches I'm having insomnia and can't sleep. My husband can't give me a break because he screams and that just upsets me more. He would get screamed at and then put him in the swing and let him scream all day it seems and I can't do that. He keeps asking me what I expected and honestly I don't know but I didn't think it would be this hard. Sometimes he'll tell me to stop complaining because I wanted him - yes I did but I need to talk to someone. I'm home alone with him all day every day comfort feeding so he doesn't cry so much. My mind and body are both worn down - boobs sore, abdomen still sore from cesarean, headaches from fatigue... I'm really struggling and I don't know how to get help. Not postpartum depression I don't think just extreme exhaustion and pressure thinking about work. Sadly not working isn't an option. Any ideas on bottle feeding, moral support or suggestions welcome ❤