I can’t enjoy my pregnancy I’m having to much anxiety

It’s getting so bad to the point where I cant even take care of myself. I just need to vent. I’m so depressed and I have anxiety from my last ectopic pregnancy I can’t even enjoy this pregnancy until I know my baby is in the right spot. I can’t even talk to my partner on how I feel about it cause he just doesn’t get it. All I know is my levels are 19-80 I wanted to do another one but they just felt like there’s no need too so they didn’t even order one for me. I thought since I’m high risk I would be doing more tests but I’m not. I’m having some pain on my right side where my remaining tube is but it’s not severe it’s just symptoms from the pregnancy but it’s like I always get bad luck nothing is ever good news too me I’m too nervous to go to my ultrasound I can’t afford too loose 2 babies and having 0 tubes 💔😪