I had a mc back in April, I was pretty far along. I was 4 months.. she was going to be my first child and it was devastating to me and my SO.

We waited to start trying again and go thru the grieving process in our own ways!!

We just started trying again about a month ago and I found out we were pregnant again about a week ago and I was about 4 1/2 weeks along and the little bean didn’t stick and I’m going thru a chemical right now according to my dr.

My hcg levels never got above a 19. I’m currently bleeding from the chemical and I hope it ends soon. 😢😢

I have always told myself starting back in April that I have to be strong and let God handle all this and he will know when I am able to carry a child to full term and he knows what is best for me..

I just don’t why I couldn’t make it past 4 months last time and why I can’t have our little ones stick.

My dr is bringing me back in on the 19th for some more extensive blood work to make sure I don’t have anything else going that just hasn’t been found yet..

All I want is a little one, I want our rainbow baby!!