I have no idea what to do..
So my husband and I have been married for a year. He was/is addicted to porn and I don't think I can get over all the things he's done to me. He would look it 16 times a day even right next to me, at family events, and before we had sex. Not videos just naked pictures of women. He also had women sending him naked pictures on some computer app he had. I told him before we got married it was a deal breaker and he told me he agreed and considered it cheating aswell.
Well for 6 months he lied. We have sex 2-3 times a day. Everyday. I give him head everytime he asks. I told him if he was doing anything wrong to just be honest and I wouldn't be angry that we just needed to talk about it and figure it out. He swore up and down even on our unborn daughters life that he wasn't. I found it. 6 months worth. Every single day, 16-20 times a day even while he was at work.
A month later I started to trust him and that's when he joined a chat and was receiving nudes from some woman on this app he has. I found that and he swore it was the last time. Again it was everytime I left the house he would look and talk for hours. He did it a third time because he was angry at me, like he did it out of spite. To add ontop of that everytime we went out he would stare at women, I mean turn his head 10 times while sitting right in front of me. Usually I let it go but he did it a week after having my daughter. Plus he made awful comments to me about my body while I was pregnant. He also has compared me to other women telling me I am worthless. So when we went on a family trip and he was too busy turning is head to stare at other women than pay attention to me and his daughter. I don't want my marriage to end but i constantly feel like I have to watch him. I get sick to my stomach everytime he's home alone. I hate not being able to live my life but I do love him..I've tried helping..offering to go to couples therapy and he says no he doesn't have a problem and if he did it's gone (out of the blue) bu what makes me so angry is he told me if I was staring at men, watching porn or anything else he would consider me a cheater and leave. How do I fix this? Women who have been through this..does it get better? Why would he do this to me ? I seriously need help..
Achieve your health goals from period to parenting.