So, my man and I have been together for 2 years. We’re now expecting our first kid in March.

A couple months after moving in together, I noticed he could really throw back some beers. Despite suffering through horrible abuse from my alcoholic father, I have him the benefit of the doubt. He had just turned 21, and he works so hard. He deserves to enjoy a six pack, right? Well, a six pack on the weekends turned into a six pack a night Mon-Sun. Which turned into 8-10 beers a night Mon-Thurs, and anywhere from 12 to 18 beers a night on Fri-Sun. I fear as time goes on, those numbers will increase.

He’s not a violent drunk by any means, if anything he becomes a bit of a cry baby. He falls and stumbles into everything, and has broken several of my belongings in the process, which I can’t even get mad over bc like I said, crybaby drunk. This past year he’s even pissed himself in his sleep several times. And it’s also effecting his work performance. He’s either still buzzed or hungover most mornings. Naturally this is all concerning to me, even more concerning now that I’m 24 weeks pregnant.

The things that run through my head- What if he falls on me one of these nights? What if he loses his job? Am I going to be cleaning up his piss while trying to take care of a newborn baby?

And the thought that really eats me alive, is this the father of my child? Is this really the man i love, my best friend? I refuse to let my child grow up seeing the things I saw. I refuse to let my child’s childhood be tainted by his fathers drinking problem. I love the man dearly, and I want him to be better. I don’t want to HAVE to leave him, but my child comes first now. That’s fair, right?

And what’s so annoying is, he doesn’t see a problem with his actions. He swears he doesn’t have a problem. I’ve tried reaching out to his parents, proof in hand, hoping they could get through to him, and they themselves are also in denial. They refuse to believe their precious son drinks to the extent he does.

So what now? What do I do? How long do I wait for him to better himself? Have I already stuck around longer than I should’ve?

I of course don’t expect any of yous to have the answers to all my questions, or the ability to tell me what to do with my life. I guess I’m just reaching out, hoping to find some sort of comfort, find someone who’s been through something similar. I don’t know.

Thank you to anyone who even stuck it out this long and actually took time out of their day to read my sob story. I appreciate it. And I hope you all have a great day, and a great holiday season.

Much love ❤️