Trust advice

Anon

Hi ladies! I could really use some help. My boyfriend and I have been together two year in January and I hate to say it but I still have trust issues sometimes! It's mostly just around time for my period so of course that's mainly hormones, but sometimes it's not around my period. Before him, I was in a very bad and abusive relationship with someone who openly talked to me about cheating on me if I didn't do what he wanted. So of course that planted a seed in my head and it's still there! I love my current boyfriend and I know he would not cheat on me, but it's almost like I just get this irrational thought sometimes. Like sometimes when he clocks in at work he doesnt have time to turn his phone off or he forgets and a couple hours later if I text him (such as goodnight if I'm going to bed, he works night shift most of the time) my messages deliver if his phone is on. And it just makes me go through all these scenarios that he's not at work and somewhere else. It's maddening! I've actually confronted him once thinking he was cheating on me because he never replied to any of my messages even though they delivered and he was off work. Long story short, he had turned his phone on when he got home, set an alarm, and fell asleep before reading my messages and replying. I know I sound insane, but I could really use some advice on how to get over this! Although, it has gotten better, I used to freak out every time when something like this happened, but now it's only sometimes. Is there anything that could help with this? I've talked to him (calm conversation, no arguing, just talking and listening and understanding) but it still obviously doesn't calm my nerves 100%. I hate feeling like this and it's not fair to him if I get myself all worked up and mad at him over nothing. I could really use some advice on how to get over this!! Thanks!!